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----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Thoughtful walk ~*~LIBRA~*~ Sometimes people need to hide away from the world so they can get their lives in order.And although you may be considering taking some time off and escaping the pressures of every day life,dont be worried:Wanting to be on your own is a natural urge that helps reboot and refresh your mind **Try to kill it everyway** I have noticed that I am getting more spiritual,not a bad thing,but confusing to me.Im starting to belive in things I never really belived in,for example... the stars.Theres more to them then just what they are,they hold meaning to me,they "show"me something.They are not just tiny specks in the sky,they are another world,another place,maybe a place for answers,I dont know,I look at the sky at night and stare at those tiny little specks and it brings me to a new level,a brings me peace,it brings me a sense of feeling refreshed.And then there are those sunsets,and the sun rises,all those colors haveto mean something,they cant just mean that the sun is coming or going,blue skies,gray skies,it all means something to me,I am just not sure what it means to me.Maybe I feel this way because I feel as though Kyle is up there and it makes everything more beautiful,it makes the gray skies seem wonderful,it makes the stars "say"something to me,it makes those wonderful colors "show"me something.It makes me realize that theres alot of beautiful things out there waiting to be noticed.It all makes me feel like I am somewhere other then here. **Wake Me Up** I took the dogs for a walk this morning,it was quite a long walk too,which was nice.They needed it,they needed to get out and be"free"for a while,they needed to be somewhere other then here,just like me.I have been neglecting them somewhat,doing what only needs to be done with them,and I have never done that.And now that I have walked them,I feel better,I feel more like myself,I feel like I have did something good for myself and for them today.I talked to Josh last night and when I got off the phone with him,I had this great idea of what i am going to do for him when he comes home.I have no clue what to get him for his birthday so I am going to ask off from work for 3 days and get a suite,with a whirlpool, so we can lounge and be with each other and just enjoy each other.Thats the best I came up with and I think its a good idea,I think it will be fun for both of us.And if he feels like staying by my house,thats fine,I have Ty the weekend he will be here so its going to be kindof different then last time,but at lease those 2 days at the hotel that we spend together will be a great time spending time together,maybe he would like to go bowling with us,I am not to sure how he feels about be around Ty yet,I would like for him to feel comfortable,but I wont push it either.Then again,I cant not let Ty be with me when he is here,my time with Ty is to precious to waste,and I hope that it wont bother Josh if I have him around.I know he is good with kids,he works with em,and I would really like for him to know Ty,and to see how we are together,and I think it will bother me a bit if he blows it off,saying that he just dosent want Ty to think that he is taking me away or something.I guess I could just say that I come with a package and in order to be with me,my package comes along no matter what,but I think Josh knows all this and I think he will be okay,I know he will be okay with it all. 8:14 a.m. - 2004-02-23 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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