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----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- paper,scissors,rock..which one? **Nothing New** I got trashed last night...nothing new. Except this time,I woke up feeling like shit,which never really happens.So I decided last night that I was killing myself very slowly.As I sat at the bar,with Amanda next to me,listening to MY music,the songs I played,I said out loud"what the fuck?pop some viraines,eat next to nothing for a couple days now and then get wasted.""what a beautiful thing to do to yourself".Amanda said nothing.And that was when I decided that what I was doing was killing myself.And I cant do it anymore.I HAVETO be done drinking.Drinking the way I do.I HAVETO be done popping those wonderful yellow pills the way I do.I HAVETO slow down,and this time is not like the rest...this time I FEEL like I HAVETO,this time I just dont want to...I HAVETO.And its goig to be a little bit hard. 6:01 p.m. - 2004-04-18 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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