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----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- questions Last night Kyle,John and Connie all came into work.Something was going on with some lady at the bar and Kyle thought I was all mad at him,which I wasent.I didnt feel to good,for some reason I got all yucky feeling,maybe to much sun?Anyways,so i left work and Kyle was all "Are you mad at me"I was like "no".They ended up coming over which I had no clue they were,so my house was a mess.Anyways,I ended up going to Kyles,and we talked about alot of stuff.He told me that I would have a hard time settling him down,and I told him that I didnt ask him for that.Then he asked me what he was to me,he said that he didnt think we were looking for the same thing,so I ask him what he was looking for(as my heart was pounding loudly)he told me "not a fuck friend"I said the same,I told him that I enjoy spending time with him,talking to him,holding him.I cant belive that he thought thats all I wanted!He said that he wanted all these kids and everything,and I said that I wanted more too.He also said that he dosent belive that I care and everything since he has been burned so many times.Well,how can I tell him that I want all the same things he does but I have a hard time beliving shit.How can I tell him that I was stuck in something bad that I gave my all in,and never got anything in return?He told me that he was an asshole,I told him he wasent.How the hell can I tell him that I am afraid of what we have?That I am afraid of him hurting me?How can I tell him that I have fallen for him?How can I tell him that if I do tell him these things,that I would be scared of what he might say?I want to be the one that makes him belive again,I want to open his eyes,and let him see that he can trust again.I care so much about him and want this to be forever,we are so great together.I can come and go as I please and so can he.This relationship is so what I have been wanting for a long time,and now that I have it,am I gonna end up losing it?Until next time......ROCK ON 7:57 a.m. - 2002-07-16 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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