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----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- a promise to me I started working out again today.It makes me feel five pounds lighter already.And I haveto stick with it.I am one of those people who can eat healthy and still gain 10 pounds.I am one of those people that has got to work out...and I haveto keep reminding myself of that.I hate how i look and feel right now,yet when I was working out,I started liking myself.I put the whole working out on hold thinking that I could be happy with out it...but I am not.And the "friend"?I cant even start to think that he would help me get motivated by going with me...we have been through that already,so after a week of being pissed off at myself..i am back to it.Without anyone trying to motivate me but myself.And today after I got done?I felt good.I felt great.And I cant wait til I get a bit leaner.Just to prove to myself that I can do it,and to prove to the "friend"that I can do it.Over time I have found out that my "friend",who is mexican likes to eat...this I knew with his size and all,but I have also noticed that most of the women in his family are large.His brother offers his wife something to eat probably every hour,my "friend"tells me that I dont need to lose weight,and he jokes about feeding me so no one will want me,and I do believe this....just because of his family and their size.But me?Oh no...not gonna happen.I have already gained at lease 10 pounds since i have been with him,and those 10 pounds will be coming off.I promise. 3:22 p.m. - 2006-07-10 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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