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----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- school days Im thinking that i will haveto quit my job in order to go back to school.And im thinking that if I quit my job then I will be poor for a while.But Im thinking that i would perfer to be poor for a while then to be unhappy at a worthless fucking job.Today I got ready for school.17 credits for one semester.I dont think that I ever did that many in one year.im excitied and worried but I have good people in my life and I am happy with the choices I have made in the past maybe...year.Im not such a drunk anymore,yet when I do drink...im a drunk,therefore,I just dont drink away to many days anymore.My health is important.Although I quit smoking and started back up just to quit again,I have narrowed it down to,i smoke alot when i drink and then it reminds me the next day on why i wanted to quit,so i quit til i drink again.I started the whole gym thing and feel like shit when i dont go,and i usually dont go because i am hung over,so its like a double shit feeling.Changes.hmmmm.im not sure how i feel about my changes,sometimes they sadden me and sometimes I am so happy that i have changed.I want to live.And I want to live now.I am tired of just "saying"things.tired of never doing the things i want to do.My chaqnge will be good...even if I fail at it. 8:19 p.m. - 2006-10-30 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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