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a tree full of sorrow

So its here.Another great holiday.
We walked home 2 years ago today.We
walked and laughed all the way home about what we had won.How we cleaned that bar out.And tonight I was going to go into that bar.But I didnt.I couldnt.I gave him his watch that night,I cried about his watch,we opened our gifts that night.I loved it.And so here I am.Here I sit HATING it.Hating it all.Here I sit with sleeping pills lodged in my throat so it will all go the fuck away.Here I sit wanting to end it all.Waiting for the end,waiting for him to visit me.Here I am on this stupid fucking holiday just wanting it to be all okay.

Merry Christams babe,I love you,I miss you.I love you so much.

12:54 a.m. - 2004-12-25

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