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Lets Play House

*Im stuck in
everything
I know*

Tylers grandma died.You know,the one with the choo-choo.Because he had so many,thats all he could remember her by.
The one WE visited for most of Tys life by OURSELVES.Without him.We were a part of their family,not him.Only when he wanted something.And about 2 months ago,maybe 3,he started taking Ty over there again.Even though he has hated them for most of his life.Not even on a regular basis,like I did.Just whenever.Whenever he felt like it,which has been twice now since 2 or 3 months ago.

*They Cut Me Like You Want Them To*

And I guess I understand.I mean after all,I stopped going over there after Kyle left.I just couldnt do it.I just didnt want to anymore.Its not that I didnt want to...I just couldnt.I felt bad,I mean after all,I did it forever.Just me and Ty,without HIM.They were my family,and after Kyle left,that was it.I had lost the only family I thought I had.I feel guilty ya know?I just could not bring myself to do something"familish"and I still cant.I still cant go to family things,they foucking get me all depressed.I would rather do nothing.I would rather enjoy it the way I enjoy them.Not by "acting"like your having a good time...but actually having one,even if it means to get fucked up and let it all out.Even if there are tears.Why shouldnt you be able to do that?I mean...its "family"right?

8:21 p.m. - 2004-11-29

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