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lay me down

I dont know whats wrong with me.
I cant let go of the things that I need to in order to move on with my life.In order to live my life.Im putting Xena down.She needs to be with him now.Its time,and although I dont want to admit it,there hasto be a time that I let go until I can be with him.He is on my mind lately,most likely because of Xena and I feel guilty.

Im fucked and need different pills.
The ones I have no longer work for me.
I just have no motivation to get new ones.
Unless if I could get some valuims.

I was much better being fucked up all the time.Sexually,I didnt care.I would tell this person and that person to fuck me and I would have the time of my life,I cant say those things to Tony.Maybe because I care,maybe because its something more then just fucking,but I do wish that I had the motivation to get some pills just to be fucked up again and remember what it feels like not to care.

How dumb can that be?

7:50 a.m. - 2009-01-29

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