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for you old friend

Will you ever tell me what I did to piss you off?I am sorry..I am a bit confused,all of a sudden things were cool and we were e-mailing...and then that was that.I dont understand if I said something or if I gave you the wrong impression...I just dont get it I guess.I was denied Mount Mary College.So I am stuck for a bit here.So I start school in less then a month...and my kid is huge.And well..I focus in everything I never did...and I stick to it.And you get mad at me.You get mad and no explanation is necessary.I dont think that that is fair.People change and people grow up...and if you want to be mad and never talk to me again...then at lease tell me why.And I will most likey understand,Theres something called "closure",and I am not saying this to make you any more pissed..I am saying this,because sometimes people need that "closure"and sometimes people need to know that they actually have it.So I think about you...and so i think about all that we have been through....and we dont even fucking communicate for like a year...yet I think.I talk...Oh my friend Josh...oh this and that.How my friend was there all the time and blah blah blah.We werent even talking....but I did.So we send e=-mail back and forth for a minute...and all of a sudden...."POOF"...gone...he is mad.I know that I have not been the greatest friend...and I do know that I have said this over and over again.And maybe I am wrong to say this...type whatever...but people change.I have changed...but you haveto be able to allow my change and accept it.Instead of drinking...lets go to a movie ...lets go eat...lets do shit together other then drinking.Be my friend.I love ya...but this is what I need and want from you.This is what I miss....this is what I miss.So be mad...Go ahead and e-mail back with something mean and rude or nothing at all.Tell me how fucked up I am again...tell me how I am weird.
Tell me that I cant have a good time.If I saved that e-mail..I would send it back to you.Tell me these things again and mean it.Mean it for life.I would love more then anything to be your friend...you just dont fucking allow it.

Peace &love
Teresa

12:40 a.m. - 2007-12-21

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