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----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- yup Im crazy for even thinking about letting Josh into my world.I once sent him my site,I guess he never got it,and at times I knew it would be okay if I sent it to him,other times,I knew it wouldnt.I once brought him into my world,maybe not all of it,but most of it,and I didnt care that I would tell him things and stuff.I felt wonderful doing that,and somehow,that all changed.And I think I know why.He was ready for something I wasent for.Things get different then.Things get different when people tend to grow more and more attached to you.And it never really stays the same because you dont feel the same way they do.But they expect you to,because you have given them what they want.And thats what they were looking for,and thats what they love.I wish I could just tell Josh to come and read this,I couldve before there was an "us"I couldve before the word "love"came up,I couldve told him and I did a couple of times,when I thought it wouldnt matter,where I thought he could and would understand me,where I thought it wouldnt matter,the nights where it just didnt matter to me anymore....and I think I need those nights back,so I can be half happy,so I can have myself back,so I can have josh back.So we can have it back.
9:59 p.m. - 2004-10-01 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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