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----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Happy Valium Day I started taking the zoloft again,kindof sucks but I know that it will help me straighten my head out.I know that I needed it.I also took a valium tonight to wish me a happy mothers day.I know it sounds all so stupid,but really,all I wanted out of this day was to spend some time with Tyler and then be in a happy state.My period should be here,yet its not,Im not to scared,I have been popping pills,not eating right and so on,so of course my body is going to be all screwed up...dont get me wrong,the thought crossed my mind....many times.And I thought about how I would tell Josh and how awful it would be to fuck his life up,but I also thought about myself and how hard things would be.But when I start thinking about those things...I go right back to thinking about how my body is just fucked up right now.I do think I am losing some weight though.The scale says different,but my legs seem skinner,I have 2 1/2 weeks left to lose the weight I need to lose,and if I haveto starve in order to lose it...then that is what I will do. 8:33 p.m. - 2004-05-09 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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