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----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +=-=no clue I think I am going to go back on the anti depressants.I think I need them.Once again,I think I need them,I think they will make every thing better and you know what?They do.They might not make things go away,but they make things go in the back of your head only returning when you want them to.I got my valuims refilled today,I didnt NEED them refilled,it was just the thought of having the prescription run out on me and when I went to go get them...it seems as though my insurance is actully covering them now,so maybe it will happen with the zoloft as well.Either way,I am going back on them...sometime. Sometime soon.Josh got a job lined up for him when he gets back.I guess its on the boat he wanted to be on,but he will be gone for like 60%of the summer.I dont know how to feel about it.I mean,yea,I am happy for him,but where do "WE" lead to?I guess I just havent had to much room in my head to think about it yet.I think its great,fantastic..whatever but it sucks because are we ever going to have a normal relationship?I can honestly say that all this thinking,all this shit in my head,makes me want to go to the bar,it makes me want to drink everything away.What a wonderful way to forget about everything.I either drink to make it go away or I pop a pill...theres something else I can fucking think about. 11:17 p.m. - 2004-05-03 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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