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----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I dont know **Tryin to figure out this life** I woke up at 2:30 today.And I am taking my last sleeping pill by 8 tonight,just because I want to sleep.I got trashed last night.More barcardi then coke now,I drank about 4 of them in a row because I wanted to.I thought maybe Mark would call,but then as I laid on my bed,I knew he wouldnt call,so I let myself pass out while the whole world was fucking spinning on me.Oh and the period came today,at lease I can be done stressing on that now.I want to get up and just take off.I have no money what so ever,but I just want to go.Go somewhere where I can be by myself,where I dont haveto worry about anybody asking me how I am doing,where no one knows me..Forever stuck in a place I cant get out of,and it sucks,and I cant accept that this is how the rest of my life is going to be.But I have a feeling that this is it for me,that I better accept it now,because it will never get any different. 4:01 p.m. - 2003-09-21 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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