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----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- another day goes by I went out last night for the first time.I went with John...and now he is with Connie this week,so she was there as well.Something weird happened though.There was a guy at the bar who is a E.M.T,I talked to him quite a bit since I have been wanting to do that forever.I am going for it.I was put in a situation that awful saturday about cpr,I dont know how to do it,I wouldve tried of course,I thought about this alot last night.I haveto do it.I have been wanting to do it for years but always thought I couldnt handel it.I think it will make me a stronger person.I am going to see what days off I have this week,and go find a cpr class and then call Gateway about the course.I haveto do this.I cried a bit last night talking about my man,John did too,he said that we shouldnt talk about it anymore.Alot of people liked my tat.I am soppouse to be grilling out with Bob today,thought I would sprinkle some pixie dust on Kyle,put some fresh flowers on his grave as well.I am running out of money,my bills are pretty much paid but now I have no money at all.I called the airlines today....nothing they can do.I have a different number I am going to try though.I cleaned up my house a bit today Kyle is everywhere,He is in every room of my house,it is hard,I stare at things,I smell everything.I tossed and turned all last night,I just had visions in my head of him being at Buckets one night taking shots of Yukon Jack talking about how smooth it was...until the next morning...ha ha.I want him here,I need him here. 3:28 p.m. - 2003-07-12 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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