Photobucket I have said to much

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Feeling evil

I am feeling evil today.I have no clue why either.I just feel like fucking with someone.My car is not done yet,thats kindof pissing me off.They have had it for over a week now I think.I have been using Kyles car which is very nice of him,but I just want my own car back!!!!I guess alot of shit is going on at work with our new manager.She is going to become our general manager and I heard that she is going to get rid of alot of people at the start of the new year,which is cool.I have nothing to worry about only cuz..1:She likes me 2:like I cant find another waitressing job and 3:I dont fuck around while I am there.I am excited though cuz one of the girls she wants to get rid of has been there for 5 years and she thinks shes the greatest and everybody loves her--ha ha to her!!I called Planned parenthood yesterday on all this irregular bleeding I have been doing,they want to switch pills on me,which is fine,but the lady asked me if I took my pill at the same time everyday and I told her yes,but I really dont,so now I am trying to.It is getting quite annoying though.Everyday for the past 3 days I get this gush of blood for a while and thats it.Yeah,I know,its disgusting.I just dont know what to do about it.I want to have sex with Kyle but then again,I dont want to dissappoint him by telling him that I am all fucked up.I dont understand none of it.It is just getting to me,and I thought that if I called planned parenthood,maybe they would want to examine me and figure this shit out,but I guess its not all that serious to them,but it is to me,cuz I am getting pissed off.I mean,I am at work and all of a sudden,bam,here it comes,for like an hour.I still have 2 weeks til I get the real thing.I swear to god,I am forever bleeding.I am a walking period.I know alot of things can set it off,but I havent been doing anything different,except for the weed thing.I havent smoked in a while,maybe thats it.I shouldve asked the lady at P.P about that.This damn bleeding thing is taking a toll on me too.I am so fucking tired all the time.I slept til like 2 on Sunday.I never sleep that late.My friend from work asked me if I could be pregnant,I said no,and even if I was,I would not be bleeding.I have taken my pill faithfully everyday since I have been on it.And before that I always got my shot on time.Its soppouse to take a while to get pregnant after you have been on birth control.And there is no way that I am that fucking fertile.I dont know,I am not even worried about it...the pregnant thing....the bleeding...yes,I am worried.It has never been like this.It is just pissing me off more and more.I havent talked to Connie in a couple days.I would like to go out with her but she dosent want Kyle to come along cuz she thinks that he keeps the guys away.Okay whatever,hes with me,not her...duh.Maybe Kyle and I can go out with John and his new girlfriend this weekend.I dont like to have Tyler sleep at someones house when its my weekend,but,I need to have some time out as well.And when Dan has him,I am working so my weekends with him are the only time I have to go out.I think I will go bike riding with him today if I can fix my bike.I want to do something fun with him.We havent done to much together.We useto go to the movies all the time,and go out to dinner,but I cant afford to do all that with the money I am making at work.And he likes riding his bike.Maybe tommorrow we can go to skatetown.We useto do that all the time too,that makes me feel like I am 12 again.I saw a picture of Dan and I in his room,and it kindof threw me off.I asked him why he had that and he just said cuz.I am sure he hates going from one house to another,but I know for a fact that he is happy without Dan in his everyday life.He told me that a million times.He told me that he hated us fighting and he hated how mean Dan was to him and me,so I guess the whole picture thing maybe reminds him that we all had a good time together once in a great while.He likes Kyle alot.The only thing with Kyle is that,him and Tyler dont really do anything together.Kyle asked him to go shopping with him for my birthday,but Tyler said no,sometimes you haveto force Ty to do things.I know Tyler would like to spend time with Kyle alone.Anyways,I better go check out the bike situation.Until next time...Rock on

1:34 p.m. - 2002-10-08

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