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----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Real live broken fingers *Life was good The Vernage called me 4 times yesterday.No can do.The last message tore me up a bit,he was crying.He was probably drunk and emotional so it dosent really matter.And I even wished that I didnt mail that letter to him but what is done is done and over with.He says that whatever he did,couldnt be that bad.That it couldnt be so bad that I wouldnt talk to him.Oh really now?Lets look back.Here I am at the hospital while my favorite aunt has a 50/50 chance,you asked me if I was okay.I said"no...but whatever",and you...YOU continued to "party"with your friends.Why were you not there for me?Why are you never there for me when I need you?Why did you make me feel even more shitty then I already did?Why do you continue to make me feel like shit?And this would be why I have nothing to say to him....he made me feel like shit,and the feeling stays with me. **I speak to No one** They took a part of my aunts skull and put it in her stomache until her swelling goes down.It dosent sound good,probably dosent look good.My mom says her stupid fortune teller lady told her that there would be two deaths in the family this year,one being my grandma since she has already left and the other one?well,my aunt is dying of cancer,and the other one sits in a room at the hospital with bits of her skull in her stomache.....now you tell me....where does this lead? *you built a nest inside my soul* I got my one tat done yesterday.Three and a half hours sitting there in pain and its still not done.I thought that I was ready to take on the pain.I wasent.I thought that I deserved to feel physical pain instead of the emotional pain I have been feeling... 7:57 a.m. - 2005-10-05 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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